If you search or “google” characteristics of a good father, you will find a lot of information. Some of it good, some not so good – and some just trash. We combed through many of the articles looking for trends and useful tips. Because one thing a good dad is always doing is learning new things.
Interestingly we found something that you don’t think about every day. On the site Parenting Plus Kids, we found a great article entitled 15 Essential Qualities of a Good Father. Part way into the article, these statements caught our attention:
According to media portrayals of dads, they are:
- Not important to the family
- Dumb (Doofus is the term I used)
- Weak
- Emotionally Unstable (not to mention emotionally uninvolved)
- Passive
- Uninvolved
The article went on to state: “I want to encourage you to ignore these poor media portrayals.”
We wholeheartedly agree! Being a dad is one of the most important jobs there is. Together, with the mother, you are raising tiny humans into full-fledged, functioning adults. No easy task in the best of circumstances, let alone in a world gone mad!
This topic could easily derail, and that is not our intent. For all you dads out there showing up and doing your best, good on you! For those who wish you’d done better when you had the chance, shame off you. Do what you can now. And for those of you in the trenches of fatherhood now, we’ve pulled some of the things we think are important. Take what works for you.
GREAT DADS ARE:
- Accountable. They are proud to be a dad and are there for their children and their partners.
- Protective. They love. They unconditionally and irrevocably support in all ways. They provide protection. They trust. And they always have a shoulder available.
- Listen. Even when it’s gibberish, they listen. Even when the words don’t come. They listen. And even if it hurts, they listen.
- Affectionate. Never be afraid to show your kids in appropriate ways you love them.
- Encourage. The little things and the big things. Sometimes your kids need your encouragement, they need to borrow your strength, to try.
- Gentle. Gentle in words. Gentle in actions. Gentle in spirit.
- Discipline Appropriately. They are firm, but just. They are consistent. They teach rather than punish.
- Lead by example. If you walk like a duck, talk like a duck, and are the duck, they will follow.
- Involved. They spend time with their children. They know them, develop a relationship, and in turn allow themselves to be known.
- Encourage independence. Tiny humans grow into amazing adults. Hopefully, when you get it right more times than you get it wrong, the reward can be amazing adults!
No matter where you are, being a father is a gift, a life-changing, rewarding and crazy-hard gift.
Celebrate the wins. Learn from the losses. And always remember you matter! Enjoy the journey!
Happy Father’s Day to you and/or the “Fathers” in your life!